Living Simply Saturday

Do you struggle with placing high or unrealistic expectations on yourself? How do you find that this affects your stress level? your attitude? your family? What helps you to release those expectations and lighten the burdens that you carry?

Today I am responding to a question I read over at Keeper of the Home. I don’t know that I am naturally a Type A personality, but I am inclined to want to be the best and do the best at everything I do. Some of this is rooted in insecurity which is a sin struggle I have. I too often compare myself to other’s accomplishments, especially in regard to housework and parenting. Yesterday, I was having an internal battle about some choices that I am trying to make, that I have not fully given over to God. I don’t always have a clean home as in everything is not always in its perfect spot. My kids don’t always do and know everything that other kids do and know. They are still young and developing, but I make comparisions, and instead of accepting and seeing what I am doing right, I place more expectations on myself as a mother, wife, and believer of the King. I fail to make the right priorities. Then, when my child has an accident going to the potty, I think, this is all my fault. I am a failure here. Then I proceed to list off everything that I am doing wrong.

So yes, I get stressed out and very overwhelmed, and it is most always my doing. As I was talking to my husband last night about the decisions and things I was pondering, I realized that I was the one who set myself up to explode – me and no one else. I had my expectations up so high that I was having trouble believing that I could make a decision to go down another road that perhaps God wants. Setting my expectations too high affects me, my self esteem, my children, my husband, the atmosphere of our home, and my obedience to the Father. When I set expectations for myself and the children that are too high, I do not show the Savior’s loving kindness when the children make mistakes. They probably do not realize that I am upset with myself and not them, and I do not want to devalue my children at all. I want them to know without a doubt that they are valuable and loved by Christ.

For me to release the expectations and lighten the burden, I need to stop making comparisions and focus more on the accomplishments. I need to give every moment and task over to the Father and ask him what is the most important thing that I achieve in that moment. I need to renew my mind and take on the mind of Christ.