Dear overwhelmed holiday mom:
To the mom who finds the holidays stressful and thinks she’s failing,
Every year I tell myself I will focus on the fact that “Jesus is the reason for the season,” that I will not get stressed out or overwhelmed, that I will slow down. And I do a pretty good job of trying not to do all the wrong things and focus on all the right things, until the deluge of emails come reminding me of all the demands on my time. I have three kids with six different Christmas parties at six different times with six different needs for each one and they are all under 7 years of age! One child has four parties!
All of the sudden things start to build and I start to panic. Never mind the fact that I lock myself out of my house, call my hubby, find a key, go on my merry way, while he’s on his way to rescue me not knowing that I’ve come up with a solution on my own. It is the perfect combination of things gone wrong that start to bring me to the brink. I wonder if I am failing as a mom, if I ever spend any time of value at all with my kids after they come home from a long day at school. As I begin to write the 1st annual Christmas newsletter that I will probably trash and forgo, I think to myself, “I’m not being intentional. I am doing everything wrong as a mom.” This is really where it all settles in.
It was only December 6th before I started feeling mildly overwhelmed this year. I haven’t said, “I hate Christmas” yet, and yes, I hate feeling that way, which is just a vicious cycle because then I begin to feel guilty for not liking Christmas when clearly, I am supposed to because Jesus was born this time of year oh so long ago. Jesus – what does he know about being a mom anyway? He wasn’t a woman, and he surely didn’t have all these Christmas parties to go to because Christmas celebrations didn’t exist yet.
But, He was Jesus. And there were swarms of people begging for his attention each day, to be healed, to be heard, to be loved, to be… Alas, I am one of them now. “Jesus, help me now,” I pray this very day. I know that if I had been there then I would be swarming, still begging too. He knew so much more than I what it means to have too many people to take care of and too many places to go. And there were festivities – a Jewish tradition and celebration for every important thing with much more ritual than my parties, much more preparation than just some chips and dip and an occasional cheesecake to bake. Our Jesus knows what you are feeling.
He was in the midst of one of those celebrations when it came time for His death. And I don’t know about you, but all this overwhelming stress I feel has never made me sweat my own blood in dismay. I have never truly carried the weight of the world on my shoulders. We are selfish to think we do.
Oh Jesus, we are sorry for this selfishness, this sin, this weight we’ve given you as you died.
Even in death they fought over his clothes, still wanting even more from this man. They didn’t know the gift He would give them.
But while on that cross, He remembered you, dear overwhelmed mom. And not just the “he died for you” type of remembering either. After He’d been crucified, after he’d been hung up to die, after they’d cast lots, he saw his mom and John nearby, and called them closer. He gave his mom to John and John to his mom. And though it was Mary in that moment, I think perhaps He thought of you and me. He knows all the ways you sacrifice, how you always give to others first, the tired ache you feel at the end of the day, the mental exhaustion you feel, how far from the mark you think you are, how you watch your children suffer in different ways at different times.
Dear Mary had no real idea that as she “treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart” that she would watch him die on a cross. Our stresses are small, and my funk is just me not stopping to glance up, to see the anguish of Jesus on the cross, look away, and fight back the flood of tears as I watch Him die, knowing I placed Him there.
Dear mom, I write these things to you because when you wake up tomorrow and feel that stress building, when you remember that you’ve forgotten one more thing, and think you cannot do it even another, you have to know that when you stop to look up to Mary’s son on the cross and treasure these things in your heart, you will feel Him renewing you, showing you how He rights your wrongs and calls you back to Him, and the funk and the stress slip away. “Those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” Isaiah 40:31
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With that in mind, I want to give you a cross necklace like the one I wrote about here to remind you to look to the cross. To enter the giveaway, leave a comment telling us how you are being intentional during this season to remind yourself of Him. The cross has been donated by the lovely Leigh Ann of Anna Florence Jewelry. The necklace is 18 inches sterling silver, and the cross is handcrafted by Leigh Ann!
Every day I remind myself about Jesus and the amazing love he has for me….Over the years Christmas has changed from the “excitement” of receiving gifts to the true “excitement” of giving to others. Remembering that a “gift” could be as simple as a hug, a listening ear or a word of encouragement. I often go back to “what would Jesus do? What would Jesus do during the hustle and bustle of Christmas? He would be….be there for whomever needed him with a smile on his face and a hug to share:). That is how I keep my heart in the right place…simply “what would our savior do?”.
I needed this today. I am already exhausted, and the calendar is overwhelmingly full! Thank you for this post.
Such a busy season and add on starting a new job December 12th, worry about a sister with breast cancer, and your bathroom under total remodel with out of town guests (sister and her family) coming for the week of Christmas. It is enough to make me want to run away from home. Instead, I think of Mary and Joseph getting ready for the birth of Jesus. Jesus, who died on the Cross to bring salvation, forgiveness, and a closer relationship with his father. That is when I lift my worries up to Him and know that everything will be okay, for He will give me what I need to get through it and savor this time with Him, family, and dear friends.
The things of this world can be so stressful and ugly. And so much of it we put upon ourselves. I had unexpected reconstructive surgery last week after a breast implant (from an earlier bilateral mastectomy) become defective. Replacement of the implant was needed along with extensive fat grafting due to thin skin in that area. With bruises all over bosy, it was much harder to recover than expected and I spent several days in bed. In that time, it was hard to rest because I knew that, in just one week, we’d be hosting an office party here at our house with close to 60 people. Decorations needed to be put up (but I can’t lift or stretch), the house needed to be cleaned (but I can hardly walk or bend), food needed to be purchased (but I have so little energy)… I was overwhelmed. On Sunday, only by God’s grace, I was able to get out of bed and get myself and my boys to church. I had such a thirst to he in His presence. There God provided the peace I needed and the answers to my plea for help. Several of my Sisters in Christ came to my aid, volunteering to help decorate and run errands. I am so humbled by their sacrifice of time in this crazy season and so thankful that God provided for me, and I make time several times a day, to tell Him so!!
I have been close to feeling this again this year…the only thing that has saved me from going over the edge is forcing myself to have a cup of coffee and The Greatest Gift early in the morning before the chaos begins. Truly, that few minutes of reading about Jesus’ coming each day has kept me saner and centered than any other year. I love your honesty!