Daytona stinks

Today Daniel and Elijah left for Daytona. We were all going to go as a family together for “one last” race there. ha. I’ll believe it when I see it. But myself, Lisabeth, and Annabelle got sick before Christmas, and Annabelle is still down and out with a stomach virus.Christmas as an adult is hardly what it was as a child. I loved Christmas – couldn’t wait for it. It represented family and fun – a time of togetherness. As an adult it is stressful and despite all my efforts, there is never this wonderful family together time that I remember as a child. Partly because people have to be grownups and work jobs. Partly because my dad died, and my family is fractured. Adulthood is not as simple as childhood. I signed up to support Daniel in his efforts to please his family and go to Daytona. Wishing selfishly in this moment, that I had been selfish and had said no so that we would all be together.

Christmas in general hasn’t been quite as fun with a sick little one. Annabelle, we will always remember your seven year old Christmas, where you spend everyday on the couch with a puke bucket beside you, slept several times on the floor of mommy’s and daddy’s bed room. We took you to the doctor yesterday, and she said it was just a virus. “Just a virus” is every mommy’s favorite words! Before Christmas, your sister was in the emergency room because we thought she either had or was getting the flu. It was also “just a virus!”

Oh, the joys of motherhood and I might I dare say, the sacrifice of motherhood. Yesterday, my dear Annabelle, I took you to Publix to pick out whatever you wanted to drink, any popsicle you wanted so as to keep you hydrated. You picked out pink lemonade and left a present on the floor for the Publix workers to clean. We went to pick up your medicine only to find that they were out, and so were the next four pharmacies they called. I dropped you at home, went to get your medicine, picked up food for your daddy and siblings, and bought some onions because I read this crazy article that said onions absorb germs (which is not true by the way). I just want you to know that I love you. One day you are going to wonder if I do – maybe you already wonder that. I do. I ran all over town for you and our family, not because I didn’t want to hang with you but because you needed me too.

With all my love,
Mama xoxo