I am an Anne of Green Gables fan. It is my favorite. I’ve often longed for a kindred spirit friend like Anne and Diana are to one another. Indeed, I’ve had Dianas in my life. I guess that makes the loss all the harder when it’s come. Instead of finding one kindred that stays throughout the ages, I’ve found it in many people God has used to fill the gaps in my heart. What do you do when you long for a bosom friend?
“Hello darkness my old friend, I’ve come to talk with you again.”
Today’s broken topic is loneliness. I am so acquainted with loneliness, she seems a friend to me. Loneliness is perhaps the number one tool the Lord as used in my life to shape me and drive me back to God.
I will not reiterate my stories of longing for a bosom friend, for the sake of my long-term readers. I might condemn myself and the world even more so if my life received definition by a bosom friend or kindred spirit, like the Anne loving self that I am. Maybe you too have longed for the idealistic friendship of Anne and Diana. Perhaps, you’ve known this type of friend before, so the longing is personal. When you long for a bosom friend and she is nowhere to be found, God is close.
Friendships are the one thing that I can count on to continually change. They do not remain steady or constant. This used to bother me. I had a hunger to know or be known. Not because of anything I’d done, but because of how I’d been raised, I had unhealthy patterns in my thought life due to relationships. People were like drugs to me. I craved their approval. I tried to make them do for me what only God could do.
Loneliness brings me to God over and over again. It has become a gracious gift. Yahweh breaks the chains of people addiction. Jesus makes me hunger and thirst for the One and Only One who always loves me without fail. Holy Spirit always moves on behalf of my good.
Like any other human, I prefer physical community over spiritual. However, I’ve also seen the Lord work on my behalf to provide for me in my weakness. And, I am learning to trust Him more. I am not alone because He is with me. His aim is not to harm me, but to give me something better than I would even know to ask for.
So would I long for loneliness again? Not loneliness for its own sake, but always for His work in me.
In my loneliness, I’ve found chains broken and community in the sacred place. This is beautiful indeed.
“There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” Proverbs 18:24
This post is one in a 31 day series of posts called, “Broken into Beautiful.” You may read all the posts in this series by clicking the graphic below.
As a military wife my friends come and go. Currently I have a great group of friends, but I know I will be moving again and will start all over. I try to stay focused on the here and now and not worry about what will happen in the future. I guess I’m afraid of the loneliness I know is coming, even though right now I’m not lonely.
I have always stayed in one spot, but I still identify because the Lord has so used seasons of change in friendships to refine me. I do find myself also afraid of the loneliness that will come. But I know the Lord wants us both to push past the fear and to trust again. It is hard! Thanks for stopping by. So glad to have you here.